True Abundance

Quite some time ago, I reached out to a business coach, because I was curious about getting outside input on "branding" and how my website and such are put together. I was speaking with this woman, who was essentially a sales person, and she used lots of psychological manipulation as part of her sales tactic. I have always been pretty immune to that kind of thing, even repelled by it... Maybe it is because there was a psychiatrist in the family, or maybe it is because I have that clear ability to see into people and their motivations for better or for worse. Whatever the case, I was turned off, rather than hooked in. Yet, my disinterest made her press harder, until she eventually said in a snarky way "So, you think you're successful now, on your own?" as a way to subtly get me to think that I could not be successful without what she was selling.

I paused and said, "Yes." 

I continued, "Less than a year ago, I left a job that was painful for me, so I could give my life to my soul's purpose. In that time, I unexpectedly and quickly ended up with a few thousand followers on social media, and work I with people around the globe, touching many lives. I do work that fills my heart and soul, and I pay my bills doing this work. I live in one of the most beautiful places on the planet, and have people in my life who I love and who love me. I may not make 5 or 10k a month, but I live with this incredible peace in my heart and a tremendous amount of love, and I know it will only get better from here, because this is still just the beginning! So, yes, I am successful, and I am in awe of it. I love my life."

She was uncomfortable and didn't say much, but I had touched something big and important within me.

Ultimately, of course, I realized I didn't want to go that route with "branding my work," and Dr Peebles (yeah, it seems like I am never going to NOT mention him, haha) encouraged me to "take up the gauntlet" and do it on my own with maybe some eventual support from friends and others, regarding "branding," also nudging me to create my own course for individuals (finally going public soon)! 

I'll be darned if I have any clue as to how to "brand" my work, when it encompasses so much and people come to me for so many reasons, but I trust the unfolding process that has been underway for quite some time. And, he is right--I LOVE working on my website. I get so many compliments on it, and it fills my heart, knowing it is my own labor of love, filled with healing energy and my own photos taken over the years. And creating my own course (that relates to much of what is below!) is part of my own flow, empowerment, and service to others.

But, what's most important is that in that moment on the phone, where I articulated my love for the life I live, I became very clear that I cannot alter how I do my "business" just for the sake of money. It has to come from the heart, and the heart of my work is and has always been service. 

I live in a state of surrender to the flow of life. I live my life in a way where I never know how and when the bills will get paid, and yet I know they won't get paid if I worry, as this is an energetic repellent of sorts and distraction from what is real--so I don't worry and instead throw myself into the moment and what I love. I enjoy my life, my service, the glorious nature, and the people I love. And the bills get paid....sometimes it has been by the skin of my teeth, but they do. 

It may not be a way of living for everyone. There are never any guarantees. There is no "certainty."  But those are always temporal illusions anyway. 

I never had a lot of money, and I often felt like a failure simply because I faced so much hardship and opposition in my life. I felt frustrated, because I wanted to serve humanity, yet it seemed I always had to fight for my existence, fighting through chronic illness and so much else. And THEN, I finally had a masters degree and a teaching job with benefits...and I went and threw that away to do mediumship and psychic work and be a spiritual guide? 

Logically it probably made no sense to some people, and yet this was the point in my life where abiding, deep peace and a flow of love entered my existence in a big way. This is where I also learned, truly, that all my earlier challenges were gifts to each person I supported through my work. Each struggle was a place where I could reach in and say "I see you. I feel you. I hear you. And I also know the way out and the way through, and I can help you find YOUR way through..." 

I had committed to the truth of my soul and my own way of being in this world. I had committed to what had always been true in me, trying to work its way out. I had committed to the healer, the lover, the artist, the mystic that I always was but tried to hide from the world. I committed to it and threw it out into the world and the world responded with "YES--you are so needed."

By many accounts, I gave up security to give myself over to the calling of my soul and a life of service. Yet what I gained is freedom and flight of soul and a love that nothing can take from me. It doesn't mean a lack of ups and downs or a lack of growth in life (growth has in fact accelerated), but rather this connection with the flow of love inherent in my being and in all things. I have never known more peace and freedom as I have known since committing my life to what pours from my heart and soul. 

And that is the truth. That is where we find true abundance, the kind that doesn't come from the amount of money in the bank or things you can buy. It's the kind of overwhelming abundance that flows from our connection with God (or Source, or...insert your own word).

I am frequently in awe of the amount of love in my life that flows from my immediate day-to-day "work life" alone. To have a problem keeping up with all the emails, messages, and comments of heartfelt gratitude is an amazing "problem" to have! To have countless people write to me and say "I know I can reach out to you and trust you; I can feel and know you are real" fills my heart in a way that money could never touch. To witness the growth and transformation in the lives of my clients and how the change in their lives is rippling out into the world around them is enough to bring me to tears of awe and gratitude. To be still in my home, hearing the birds conversing outside and the wind in the redwood trees fills me with peace. To go to the ocean and feel the earth holding me and hear the sound of the water....there are no words for that.

Yes, we all have to pay the bills. And, yes, it is good to have ambitions and goals! There is nothing wrong with money. It is part of our world and part of how we exchange energy. There are big things I want to accomplish in my own life that will require much, much more money, and I am aware of that! But, I also know that I just have to keep going and trusting life to provide, knowing that I cannot manipulate my way into those things but rather that in the flow of God, when the human will is aligned with that flow and dedicated, all things are possible in time. I have watched myself align with my own soul and seen the power of that, and shown it to others, too. I know it is a matter of continuing on as I am, building momentum, rather than worrying about how to fill some imaginary void of money!

It is so easy in our world to get caught in the trap of chasing the next thing, whether it's the bigger paycheck or the next bauble. And while there is nothing wrong with the bigger paycheck or the pretty ring, or whatever it is, it is important to understand that none of these things are measures of abundance, love, or satisfaction in life. Money is not a measure of wealth or abundance. Money is not a measure of how good or bad someone is (and oh boy I could go on a rant about "spiritual materialism" and the law of attraction--yes the law of attraction is real but the way it is taught is often not the whole story). 

Money is just something we use to keep the engine of our lives going on the material plane. It can be used in so many different ways, but it has very little to do with true abundance. 

Abundance flows from the soul and in an exchange with life itself. Abundance is about love, and we all know that money can't buy love (is anyone else singing the Beatles in their heads?).

Don't let anyone sell you anything that doesn't jive with your soul. Don't let anyone convince you that you are less than for any reason. Don't compare your lives to others, dear ones. You don't know what anyone else's story is about.

Instead, live your life, your story, YOUR way.

Rise in the love you have within you.

You are the one.

I love you.

If you would like to receive messages like these to your inbox each week, please sign up here!